So it all started
with a note from my editor - "We're going to cover these three conventions
in four days in Vegas. Bring your heels, walking shoes and a low-cut
dress." Being relatively new to the adult forums and subject matter
(save for my own promiscuous adventures), it would be interesting
to see how the true professionals handled things. So I followed the
directions, and we were off for a week in Vegas.
First
came Internext - a business-to-business venue, showcasing how people
make money on pay-per-view sites while giving everybody excuses to
party with porn stars every night. The Las Vegas Internext Expo is
the largest adult Internet trade show of its kind in the world. This
is not truly my arena, but it mattered to my editor, so we waded through
walls of porn stars, webmasters, providers of content, affiliate programs,
hosting services, technology companies, novelty distributors, the
press and more adult talent.
Now, it may not have been my type of show, but - I have a confession
to make - I am a SWAG whore (SWAG - Stuff We All Get), and they were
handing out free novelties with their company names stamped on them
by the handful. I had a blast dipping into every jar offered to me.
I got about 20 T-shirts saying everything from "We Don't Suck" to
"Sex.com". I got photos signed by gorgeous porn stars (oddly enough,
I discovered I like brunettes more than blondes - especially when
they slide up next to my body for girl-on-girl photo-ops) and other
fun little things - pens, flashlights, condoms, small tubes of lube
and more.
I saw Larry Flynt flanked by what looked like Secret Service men who
were handing him magazines, one after the other, to sign for an unbelievably
long line of fans. Ron Jeremy - God, one has to wonder how he made
so much money in the porn industry because he is NOT a looker. Regardless,
he was flanked by scads of gorgeous women, all pandering to have their
photo taken with him. He must be hung like a horse.
But primarily, this was a B2B show - how your site can make money.
Lots and lots of companies are ready to show you how to do that, and
just how they could help you accomplish it.
ON TO THE PORN STARS…
Next on the agenda was the AVN Adult Expo 2004, held at the Sands
Expo center, part of the Venetian Hotel Complex. We stayed at the
Venetian, so getting down to the show was no problem, if one managed
to cross the line of gawkers and porn-geeks all standing in line to
catch a glimpse of their favorite adult actress/actor. Also in town
was the Consumer Electronics Show (CES), so it truly was geeks-galore
meets pussy-galore. Imagine standing in the lobby with fellows in
jeans and sneakers staring at the Porn-queens in the skimpiest outfits
and highest stiletto heels, and you've pretty much got the picture.
The
AVN show is held in conjunction with the AVN Awards, touted as the
"Oscars for the Adult", by Entertainment Weekly. The AVN awards, held
every January, are the annual ceremony celebrating the finest in adult
films and videos with a lavish awards show and dinner.
This year's winners included Male Performer of the Year Michael Stefano
(formerly known as Luciano during his time with Extreme Associates).
Ashley Blue won for the Female Performance of the year. "I never thought
I'd be cool enough for this one," squealed petite Ashley Blue. "This
sounds really dumb, but I thought I was going to get Best New Starlet,
so this is like a whole bigger deal, and I'm really happy." Ashley
is best known as a gal who can do some of the best anal scenes in
the business. More than half of her roles have involved anal, often
d.p., and in those anal scenes, almost always ass-to-mouth. Impressive!
The annual AVN Awards Show extravaganza is packed with live music,
sexy entertainment and appearances by every major star in the business.
Nearly 100 awards are given out in categories as diverse as Best Film,
Best Video and Best Actor to Most Outrageous Sex Scene, and Best Group
Sex Scene.
But before you can even get tickets to the awards show (at a cool
$250 a piece), it's best to head on down to the trade-show to get
a spicy premiere of what might happen. Replete with scantily clad
women, shirtless and oiled-down men, and every possible combination
thereof, it's fun to walk the aisles with folks who are proud of what
they do for a living.
Everywhere you turn, there is yet another photo-op, but I have to
admit, I myself am not the most porn-star type and am terribly camera-shy.
I now have these photographs of luscious bodies draped all over me,
and my face looks like I am being hugged by my grandmother.
ON TO THE DOLLS AND DILDOS…
The Casino Bar in the Venetian was so packed in the evening that the
first ten tables on either side of the bar were virtually unplayable
- it seemed to be the congregating place for geeks and glamour-cons,
with the former hoping desperately to make a lasting impression on
the latter.
Imagine little old me, in a corset and skirt, with my money stuck
down my cleavage (hey, it's the only place I KNOW I won't lose it)
and men stopping me all the time to put more money down or asking
if they could slip business cards down my front. I simply smiled my
"You think I am a star" smile and kept walking, enhancing their experience.
It wasn't quite as powerful a statement as the German man at the Rio
casino who offered me $500 to go back to his room with him (to which
I replied, ever-so-sweetly - "Nein, danke."). I was on my way to a
private party and $500 was definitely not worth missing the festivities
for. I say that private parties with cool attendees are the place
to be.
BACK TO THE SHOW…
If you ever saw the HBO Real Sex episode where they mentioned "Real
Dolls," you'd have been ecstatic: there were examples there that you
could touch, feel and even play with briefly. To say that I want one
is to not look at the price tag ($5,999 for a basic model), but I
can at least claim to have been "with" one.
Also on hand were the makers of the Fukuoku, the revolutionary Five
Finger Massage Glove (more on my first hand experience with this here
in another article) and the "Flaunt It" sexual card game. This was
dubiously compared to UNO for me, but I get the feeling it's a little
deeper than shouting "UNO!" when you're down to your last card. We'll
see.
My favorite display was the table of glass dildos- which incidentally are not
made of glass any more, but instead are now made of the more durable Pyrex so you can heat or cool them to whatever temperature
you choose and insert them into any of your preferred orifices! Sounds
fun, but I couldn't finagle a free sample to try out for all you avid
readers at home. I'll keep trying! Some companies to try - if you're
too quick to wait for my pathetic attempts to try to obtain samples
to review for you - can be found at the bottom of the page. But hey,
I am a connoisseur so trust me, some day I will have first hand knowledge
to share with you!
ON TO THE BONDAGE…
Finally, towards the end of the week, we attended Bondcon, the annual
Bondage show where over 200 famous bondage models as well as bondage
and fetish photographers congregate to share their wares. Other folks
come to showcase their newest, latest and greatest bondage products.
On hand were the old standbys - corsets, ropes, handcuffs, leather
wrist/ankle restraints and the like-- but interspersed were some truly
(to my eyes) innovative ideas.
You
could find boots, whips, bondage furniture, revealing clothing, exquisite
clothing (or lack-thereof) by Sinthetex, books by Priaprism Press
with fantastic hand-drawn pictures of women in the most dire bondage
situations, and other purveyors of clothing for those who wish to
play and look their best at the same time by Betty Bangs. There were
also representatives from professional Bondage houses throughout the
US, so you can travel and have your fun, too!
Now, a personal kink of mine is needles - needles in my breast, through
my nipples, and more - are you into medical scenes? There was even
a company dedicated solely to that. Admittedly, it had clamps and
all sorts of things which I think might be a little too extreme for
me (ask me again in a year and I might tell you the exact opposite),
but the selection was complete and made me drool.
I have to say though, there was a demonstration put on by the
House of Gord which stopped me in my tracks. A woman, completely encased
in rubber, with a rubber gag covering her mouth and even extreme bondage
toe-shoes, was on a treadmill - on her toes - sort of bounce-running.
She was so enjoying herself, and so were the onlookers, that I found
myself quite entranced. It did - I'm willing to admit - get me a little
hot.
I like bondage - most of it. Some of the aspects seemed a little extreme
for me, but then again I am a relative newbie to the scene. Things
that I once was adamantly against I now beg for with a craving that
verges on obsession. But I digress. The joy on this woman's face during
the Gord demonstration, and the pride she took in her performance,
more than make up for any reservations or hesitations I may have harbored
until that point.
ONTO THE PARTIES AND DEMOS…
I have to tell you this was the highlight of my weekend (a close second
was seeing Seymour Butts in the taxi line at the Venetian. I LOVE
him), was the play-party at Bondcon on Saturday night, sponsored and
hosted by Extreme Restraints. This is a troupe dedicated to giving
the audience a taste of what BDSM could truly be through performance,
but they also do it for their own fun. Suspension, whipping, electrosex,
medical scenes, straightjackets, - you name it - these folks can handle
whatever scene you're into. Run by the indomitable Sir Nic (who you
MUST see in action), the group excels in what it does. They have submissives
you can watch, they have dominants who can cause the loveliest of
pain and they do it all with just the mixture of disdain and
piqued interest.
No trip would have been complete without a visit to Sinthetex booth.
Wanna see lovely women in garments that inspire me to think of some
outlandish cartoon outfits (think Aeon Flux) attire? This is the place
to be. Beautiful women in barely-there outfits were a particular highlight
for me. I'm not sure my partner agreed, but it was enough to get my
mind racing.
Let's face it; I missed a lot of demos and after-hour private parties
at all three conventions. I was busy attending play parties and soirees
at private suites in various hotels around town. And yes, yours truly
had her posterior quite red for days from a spanking demonstration.
I wanted to attend the Cigar Parties and the Web-master poker games,
but when it came down to it, I had a much better time watching people
play, getting played with and encouraging those who were getting played
with.
Truth be told, I love porn stars, especially when they're NOT acting.
It had to be nice for them as well to let loose and feel what was
happening.
I definitely had a surreal feeling in Vegas that week. With CES, AVN,
and the AVN award shows, the eclectic mix of people sometimes made
it more fun to watch than anything else. Porn stars in heels and barely-covered
boobs walking next to camera-gadget dorks who assumed every well-dressed
woman there must have been involved in the adult business somehow.
I felt disinclined to disabuse them of their misconceptions. And hey
- who doesn't feel flattered to be taken as beautiful enough to be
considered a porn star?
Bondcon wasn't too busy, but AVN and Internext seemed ready to burst
in my opinion. I know I would go back to Bondcon, but next time I
think I'll let my boss head to Internext (which is really more B2B
focused) and AVN (think thin women in size two clothing with size
72 breasts). No offense - if I could look like that naturally I'd
be in there, so next year you can find me at the bar at Bondcon,
watching for Masuimi Max (whom I met briefly while she readjusted
her hair and immediately fell in love with), dominatrix Simone Kross
or some of the other gorgeous Dommes.
It definitely was an experience I am glad to have taken. Ah, what
the hell…I'd do it all again. Just to see Larry Flynt and flash my
boobs at him while the immoveable security tried desperately not to
look.
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